Ten Things To Do In The Village

1. If you're really bored, count the number of right-wing Republicans.
2. If you don't have much time, count the Democrats.
3. You can go to eat. It's usually busy during the "early bird" specials. People are still awake.
4. I like reading The Village Voice. I'm not sure if it's a religious journal, a military story-book, or a POA publicity stunt.
5. You can go golfing. The price isn't bad if you own property. Of course, the price of the property is bad, so you probably come out even. 
6. You can go fishing, although there are better lakes not very far away.
7. How about joining a club? We got all sorts of clubs. We even got a club that teaches you how to start clubs.
8. I like to walk the trails. We got a lot of nice trails. Of course, none of them really lead anywhere, but what the hell.
9. I like to go to POA meetings, but they are a lot less interesting now that the general manager is gone. I started a game online to guess why he got the axe. So far, misuse of credit card is ahead, but being an asshole is a close second. 
10. I love to drive DeSoto. It's a challenge better than a video game. Between the road itself, with its dips and curves, and the drivers, old and old, it can turn a dull, boring day into an adventure.