Things That Would Help Hot Springs Village Prosper:

1. Close down the gates and put up Welcome signs.
2. Charge $30 per round of golf for everyone. $35 if you have your won cart.
3. Half the residents have to become Democrats. The Democrats, or Democrat, which is probably only me, get to pick which half.
4. Everyone has to spend at least $50 per month at the restaurants. Consider this a restaurant tax. Proceeds go to the hungry in Arkansas.
5. For every right-wing Republican who is collecting social security, you have to put that "socialist" money in a fund to help stamp out right-wing Republicanism in the Village.
6. A jail should be built to house white, male, Christian, Republicans who think they know everything. It will need to be rather big.
7. No one over 85 can drive at night, or on cloudy days, or when the temperature is above zero.
8. If you think you are better than anyone outside of the Village, you have to pay a $100 "superiority complex" fine per month. This money will be used to re-sensitize you to reality. Electricity will be involved.
9. Finally, we will have to get rid of at least half the churches. They scare people.