ANSWERING THE E-MAIL

-Dear Peever: I don't like undressing in the locker room. What do you suggest? (Bob, age 16)
Dear Bob: You can do one of two things. Either put your shorts on underneath your pants, thus limiting your amount of exposure, or quit school.

-Dear Peever: I have trouble attracting members of the opposite sex. Any suggestions? (Tommie, age 27)
Dear Tommie: Remember to take a bath daily, brush your teeth, change your underwear, and put on deodorant. And by the way, give up the dress, stockings, and high heals.

Peever: I have a man who keeps bothering me. I think he wants to go to bed with me. What can I do to discourage him? (Tammy, age 32)
Dear Tammy: Tell him you really like Melissa Etheridge, or shoot him. The later suggestion comes with a guarantee.

Mr. Peever: Is it ok for older people to have sex? (Sally, age 68)
Dear Sally: It's ok, but highly unlikely.

Dear Mr. Peever: How will I know when I hear the Truth? (Karrie, age 24)
Dear Karrie: The Truth is never served with fancy dishes or elaborate packaging. It is simple, alluring, openhearted, and will cause you to ask more questions than it answers. Questions initiate The Quest. Or, on the other hand, you could just listen to everything I say.