TEN WAYS TO TELL IF YOU ARE A RIGHT-WING, CHRISTIAN, REPUBLICAN

1. You picture God as a white male, about age 58.
2. You take everything in the Bible literally, except the part about not killing.
3. If anyone suggests there might be other relevant religions besides Christianity, you turn homicidal.
4. You get Moses and Charlton Heston confused.
5. You think Rush Limbaugh is a prophet.
6. You figure the American flag might well have been the original shroud.
7. Anyone who don't think like you is the enemy.
8. Liberalism has this hopeful, compassionate, caring quality to it that you despise.
9. You're good at maintaining a position of ignorance and close-mindedness.
10. Look in a mirror. If it doesn't cast a reflection, don't say I didn't warn you.