GOLFING MY WAY TOWARD GOD

• MY GOLF GAME IS MEDIOCRE AT BEST. HANDICAP AROUND 18. MOST OF MY SHOTS HAVE AN "OH GOD" OR "JESUS CHRIST" EXCLAMATION AFTER THEM. IT'S IN A MOST REVERENT WAY.
• THERE DOES SEEM TO BE LOT OF PRAYING TAKING PLACE ON THE GOLF COURSE. GUYS KIND OF BOW THEIR HEADS WHEN PUTTING AND TAKE A LOT OF TIME. I DON'T TAKE NEARLY THAT LONG, WHICH IS PROBABLY WHY I THREE PUTT A LOT. LONGER PRAYERS MUST BE BETTER. OR SO SAYS EVERY MINISTER I KNOW.
• THE FIRST TIME I HEARD SOMEONE YELL "FORE" I THOUGHT THEY WERE YELLING "WHORE." I DIDN'T THINK THAT WAS VERY NICE, ALTHOUGH I DID LOOK AROUND. ENDS UP THE GUY WAS A BAPTIST, WHICH I COULDN'T QUITE FIGURE OUT. AN HONEST MISTAKE, I'M SURE.
• I DO MAKE ERRORS ON MY SCORE OCCASIONALLY. I ASK FOR FORGIVENESS, IF THAT COUNTS FOR ANYTHING. 
• I HAD A HOLE-IN-ONE ABOUT 7 YEARS AGO. GOD WAS WITH ME THAT DAY. SO WERE THREE OTHER BLIND PLAYERS.
• GOLFING ON SUNDAYS COUNTS FOR CHURCH. BESIDE THE CUSSING, CHEATING, AND CLUB THROWING, IT'S A PRETTY SACRED TIME. THE BENEDICTION USUALLY CONSISTS OF A "THANK GOD THAT'S OVER," AND A BEER OR TWO.
• YES, GOLF IS A SPIRITUAL ENDEAVOUR. ENLIGHTENMENT COMES TO THE PERSON WILLING TO CHASE A BALL FOR 4 HRS, OVER 5 MILES; RETRIEVE IT OUT OF SNAKE AND TICK INFESTED WOODS; FISH IT OUT OF NUMEROUS SLIMY PONDS; AND WHEN SOMEONE YELLS "WHORE," NOT TO TAKE IT PERSONALLY.